Please learn to love yourself and stop searching for validation of that in other people. The way we are and the way god has made us, we should be blessed. We are healthy and so fortunate to be able to walk on this earth day in and day out. To make the choices we can, to be able to make mistakes but also then learn from them, to be given a chance to be our higher, better selves.I have multiple friends of mine who feel insecure about themselves from time to time. This includes me too. I went through a period in my life where I could not stop comparing myself to others, whether it was social media, work, friendships, relationships, just everything in life. I was feeling so insecure and overwhelmed at what I thought everyone thought I should be that I couldn’t handle it anymore. I lost sight of who I was. I realized some things needed to change.
I took some time away from social media, I took myself away from the people I was constantly comparing myself too, and I started to look inwards. What was it about me that I disliked so much that I felt I had to be like the other person? I realized I had no idea who I was because I was constantly comparing myself to other people. I realized something had to change. That change wasn’t going to come out of nowhere and be handed to me on a golden platter. That change was going to come from me.
Little did I know how much work I had to put in to be at ease with myself once again and truly be okay with myself. I joined kickboxing thinking maybe some of the stress from being incomplete would wear off but that didn’t help. I then decided to switch my sleeping schedule, start eating better, incorporating exercise into my routine, taking yoga, challenging myself everyday in trying to learn new things. Once I could focus on what I needed to change, I realized where in my life I needed to make those changes too. I started spending more time with my family, my close friends, meeting new people.
Overall, it is still an ongoing process and will always be but I can see what all these minor changes in my life have done for me. I have become more positive, more at peace with myself, learned to understand that it was okay to make mistakes and forgiving myself for those mistakes gave me a new sense of being. I no longer looked for validation in others, rather I looked for answers within myself. How was I feeling at the moment? How could I change that outcome if I was not happy with it? And best of all, how could I learn to just be in stillness and peace even when nothing in the world seemed to make sense… even when it seemed like the whole world was against you.
Learning to trust myself, trust the uncertainty of the future and not feel anxious anymore helped seal my anxious feelings. It helped make clearer who I was and I have so much more respect for myself knowing I did not let myself sit in a rut but rather chose to get up and make changes in my life happen. You can do this too! Please try to take care of yourselves because all of us are precious beings that have every right to live our dreams and be healthy, caring, and optimistic individuals. If you feel like you’re stuck, it’s time to make some changes. Remember, bad things may happen to you but they don’t have to hold you back or make you feel any less. Remember, you make your life what you want it to be like.